Prayer

This is how I feel lately when I pray, like a child. I am reading an awesome book on prayer by Phillip Yancy called Prayer and I must admit my prayer life has just been getting better and better as I keep my time with God more in the "to do" column than I had been for awhile. Not that I didn't pray, it is just that honestly I didn't do it on purpose, if that makes sense. Like spending time with my husband or my boys.

But even more than the changes that my consistency have had on how I feel during my prayer time, the decision we have been trying to reach about adopting a baby from Ethiopia has had huge impact. Which is why I feel like a child, it is at these times in life when making such important decisions or going through hard times that I always drawn closer to God, it has always been that way in my life and I think some of that is normal, but this time I am seeing it clearer and it makes me sad that when I want guidance I am more faithful in my prayer time and when I feel like I am doing just fine on my own I still pray but it is more like something I am supposed to do it and it should be like why I spend time with my husband and boys because I love them.